Intro to Magic & Witchcraft: Advice for New Witches from Disapproving Households
For many people, interest in the practice of witchcraft and magic begins long before adulthood. In fact, most people that I have talked to and collaborated with report starting their “witchcraft journeys” somewhere between the preteen and late teen years. This means that it is very common for newcomers to the practice of magic to live at home with their families or guardians. Unfortunately, not every household is supportive of a young person’s budding interest in the occult. Parents, guardians, siblings, and other cohabitants in the home may express fear, disapproval, or disdain for witchcraft. They may disbelieve in the existence of magic, which can manifest in some truly disheartening comments and behaviors. Or, they may outright forbid any practice or study of magic in the house.
What does one do when their new interest in magic is met with fear or the threat of punishment? Many new witches may choose to hide their practice as they explore it, while others may try to lay their household’s fear to rest with research and frank discussion of the topic. Some may rebel and maintain their practice in the open regardless of what their families say. And others may not feel say doing any of those things.
Ultimately, how you decide to move forward when you have a parent or guardian that fears, disapproves of, or prohibits your magical practice is up to you. Only you know your situation; and only you can make an informed decision about your preferences, relationships, well-being, and personal safety. However you choose to handle the situation, here is some advice for any situation.
When Your Household Disapproves, but It’s Safe to Talk It Out
In an ideal situation, knowing that a parent or guardian disapproves of the practice of magic won’t necessarily mean that they’re not open to discussion. It is our sincere hope that everyone in this situation feel safe enough to have a conversation about things that they may not agree with their guardians about. But what can you say? How can you—as a newcomer to witchcraft yourself—explain your interest in magic to someone else?
Be prepared. We all know how difficult it can be to talk to parents and guardians about something we really, really want but feel like we can’t have. The experience is frustrating and emotional. One way to make it easier is to prepare yourself in advance. You may want to make out a list of talking points to help you keep your thoughts organized. Or you may want to just spend some prep time looking at links and books that you can show your guardians to help your case.
Be honest and informative. It may be helpful to talk about some of the different magical paths you’re interested in. It may also be helpful to discuss why you’re interested in them. Acknowledge the risks and tell them about the ways you plan to navigate those risks. Inform them about your personal rules and boundaries—and be flexible. Your household may be comfortable with you doing some things, but not others.
Be open to sharing, supervision, and other caveats. One thing that may happen is that your parent our guardian may agree to let you study magic as long they are able to research, screen, and approve books, blogs, and websites that you study from. This may be a good place to start. Other times, you may be asked to hold off on taking up the broomstick until you are a little older. Again, that’s something to be open to.
When Your Household Forbids It, and It’s Not Safe to Proceed
Occasionally, someone in charge will say, “No, absolutely not.” They will expressly forbid witchcraft in the house. And, in many cases, a new witch may not feel safe rebelling against them. But what if you still feel drawn to studying witchcraft and magic? What if you don’t want to give up—even if you don’t want to break the rules?
Don’t fret—there is no Best By date on witchcraft/magic? First, remember that witchcraft and magic was there when you found it. And it will still be there when you are able to come back again. Your invitation does not have an expiration date!
If it is safe for you, you can always study without practicing. There is no rule that you have to begin your study and practice at the same time. If you are not allowed to practice magic and witchcraft, you may be still be able to do online research, watch youtube videos, and follow blogs that inform and inspire you.
If your household’s objection stems from religious beliefs, consider alternatives that don’t go against them. There is magic of all kinds in the world. If your household is opposed to certain kinds of magic for religious reasons, you will likely be able to find magic that is actually built on your household religion.
Learn magic that doesn’t require supplies. There are lots of ways to use magic that don’t require altars, books, or supplies. Magic can be done with writing and symbols. It can be done through speech and thought. Although these forms of magic may not be what you had in mind, they are skills and practices that many witches incorporate into their crafts as they learn; and they may be a good starting point if you are unable to keep supplies or curios in your house.
Your Well-Being Comes First
There are, of course, lots of ways to navigate practicing magic in secret (sometimes known as being “in the broomcloset”). You can find hordes of advice for hiding and disguising your growing craft from your disapproving household online. Examples may include performing your craft with commonplace household items, covering your books with paper book covers, and keeping your grimoire in digital format.
While these tips can all be helpful for the new witches who decide to embrace their rebellious side and forge ahead regardless of the opinions of their household, it’s important to make sure that your safety and well-being always come first. For many people, the grim reality is that it’s not safe for them to explore or practice magic against their household’s wishes. To those people: always, always put your physical and emotional safety first. Witchcraft is amazing—but it’s simply not worth putting yourself in harm’s way for.
Our advice to new witches above all is this: Be safe. Put yourself first. And stay curious.
Disclaimer: Each of the Crowsbone writers and guest bloggers has their own magical background, beliefs, traditions and practices. These post represent the opinions, research and beliefs of the individual writers. We do not believe that they represent beliefs and rules associated with all magical practice or witchcraft; nor do they represent the beliefs and opinions of all of the Crowsbone community.